A couple of weeks ago my son- a newbie driver - followed Dave to the gas station so Dave could get him some gas, my son got pulled over and Dave called me LAUGHING his ASS off. I told him it wasn't funny and to go to the cop car. He said "NO WAY, am I walking up to the COP CAR" we had a big "discussion" about how I would've gone up to the cop car, and how Dave said he would NEVER do that.
Last night we had my parents over for dinner and Dave and my dad were drinking their beers, I'm not drinking at all - well-my water :). My neighbor text's and says come over when your parents leave and have some drinks. Dawson is at the bike park and I need to pick him up at 10:00, he had called and asked if Tyler (never met him) and Issac could spend the night and I said "yes." I called him at 8:45 and said "can I come get you now because I'm going to a party and I want to have a couple drinks?"
He says "NO, PICK ME UP AT 10:00"
I say to Dave "can you pick them up?"
he says "NO. I've already had 6 beers"
"Fine lets go to the neighbors and then I will come back and get Dawson and his friends"
the lights at the bike park turn OFF at 10:00pm
We walk to the neighbors about 10 houses up and Dave has 3 more beers and I have 1 1/2 and I say "we have to go, I have to get Dawson and his friends."
Dave finishes his beer and we walk home, at this time Dawson has called and said "the lights are off are you coming?"
"yep on my way."
I get into the car and start thinking about DJ snapping at a kid at the party- not hurting him, but I was thinking maybe we should've talked to his parents about it right -then and there. I called to talk to Dave about and Devon answers the phone - "HELLLLLOOOOOOO"
I say "let me talk to your dad"
Devon starts screaming for his dad -and I get this idea in my head to tell Dave I got pulled over. (I'm so damn mean)
he gets on the phone "what??"
I say in a low voice "I'm getting pulled over"
he says "do you have something to put into your mouth?"
I wanted to laugh but I she "oh my god -no"
he says "you are going to have to deal with this."
I said "who is going to get Dawson?.... Oh I have to go" I hang up on him. I start laughing to myself thinking well he wont drive, and he wont let Devon drive him I will call him back when I'm at the bike park while the kids are loading.
I get to the bike park and Dawson comes to the car and these 2 guys (I know them, but I'm not using their names) GROWN ASS MEN both in their late 30's- one has kids watching- are fighting in the parking lot - not throwing down yet, but SCREAMING at each other and circling each other. Dawson says "dad said you got pulled over"
I said "I was joking- what's going on here?"
Dawson said "they have been doing this for hours"
his guy walks over to my car and says "this is crazy, one of them hit the other-ones kid and they crashed, so he told the other guy you're not a good dad because you're not watching your kids, and they are both in trouble with the cops so both of them are waiting for the other to punch first"
I said "are those his kids watching this shit?"
the guy said "yep - great role models"
I yell out "GO HOME"
the guy says "they aren't going to listen, and the cop is just sitting right there watching them anyways"
I look over and the cop turns his lights on and comes over I hear him say "what are you guys fighting over?" the whole gang of people start talking and the cop puts his hand out and says "ONE AT A TIME"
I have forgotten about my little joke I pulled, and Dawson starts telling me what happened that they are fighting over. Dawson phone rings - I say "oh shit, don't answer it." Dawson declines it.
he says "I'm calling my dad and telling him you are joking, he is probably worried about you"
Dawson friends are in the back and Dawson is in the front. Dawson calls Dave "Hey, mom was joking"
I cant hear what Dave is says but Dawson says "mom is stupid"
I say "HEY!!"
I take the phone from him and Dave says "I ran to Hess and Jordan looking for you."
I said "WHAT??? YOU RAN???"
he says "YES - I RAN!!!!!"
"honey I'm so sorry I'm almost there I will pick you up"
he says "DO NOT PICK ME UP!!!"
and he hangs up. I say to the boys "I'm in BIG TROUBLE"
Dawson says "you're stupid"
I say "I KNOW"
we pull onto Hess and Dave is walking I pull over and he says "GO HOME MEGAN."
I say "NO, I WILL PULL UP-- AND YOU WILL GET IN THE CAR."
he says "NO - GO HOME."
so I pull up and turn around so I'm off of Hess (because it's a busy road)
we look down the street and Dave is gone - look up the street and Dave is gone. Dawson gets out and I say "he is hiding in the bushes"
Dawson is kind-of scared because he has no clue what his dad is doing so he turns on the flash light on his phone and he can see Dave hiding and says "GET IN THE CAR."
Dave says "NO"
Dawson says "GET IN THE DAMN CAR."
Issac says "is this a normal night?"
I said "yep - hangin with the Foster's"
Dawson says "GET IN THE CAR."
Dave comes out of the bushes and looks at me and says "I'M NOT GETTING IN THE CAR, LET ME WALK AND COOL OFF."
I think to myself ....."oh shit - YOU IN BIG TROUBLE"
so the other kid in the car Tyler (who I just met) is in silence, does NOT know what to say or do. Dawson gets into the car and says "he is MAD at you, do you think you will get divorced over this? If you do Devon and I will make your "NEW LIFE" with your "NEW FAMILIES" a living hell"
I say "Dawson we wont get divorced over this."
he says "this was stupid mom, don't do this again."
"I KNOW" I get home park the car and start running, I run ...and run until I see Dave and then I run faster, I get to him - "I'm SO SO SO SORRY, NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS DID I THINK YOU WOULD RUN LIKE FORREST GUMP."
He laughs a little and hugs me.
I said "what were you going to do??? you don't go up to cops."
and through the tears he said "I don't know, I was so scared for you, I just wanted to be there for you. I couldn't get into the car because I was so emotional"
I felt like a piece of shit, I BIG HUGE PIECE OF SHIT.
I apologized all the way home - and when he got home I said "REALLY??? You start running??? You don't run!!"
He says "I know, I think I should start, I almost passed out twice and had to stop once because I thought I was going to throw up"
Poor guy....NEVER doing that again he told me that one of my "JOKES" is actually going to make him have a heart-attack, and then I will REALLY feel like shit.
He is pretty sore today from his running...... but at least he is laughing about it today :)
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